Sheela-na-Gig aka Jeanne Rathbone

The phallic tie

Posted in The Phallic Tie by sheelanagigcomedienne on December 1, 2016

One review of my show in the Connaught Tribune 1996 added a  PS Wearing ties not recommended. I never did find out if any clips of my show were shown in Norway.

A Norwegian film crew, rain drumming off the marquee and rivulets running underfoot set the bizarre scene for Jeanne Egan’s opening performance of “Sheela-na-Gig’ at Taylors Bar.

Perhaps none other than a Scandanavian TV crew could dwell upon the incongruities of two millenia of western development as brought out here . They just happended to be exploring the Sheela-na-Gig phenomenon after discovering some figures in their home country.

P.S. Wearing ties not recommended.

The tie is a phallic symbol which has replace the cod-piece. A cod-piece from Middle -English : cod, meaning “scrotum is a covering flap or pouch that attaches to the front of the crotch of men’s trousers and usually accentuates the genital area.

It is preposterous and decidedly kinky that it is also an essential part of enforced school uniforms in Britain. Why don’t schoolchildren rebel against this infringement of their civil liberties?

The tie is a piece of cloth that men wear around their necks. It serves no useful purpose except as an inadequate bib or dribbler especially when eating curries. They are so PHALLIC, silly and pointless.

“If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck?” Linda Ellerbee (US journalist

The tie is always longer than twelve inches and it points down to a man’s genital equipment or as I prefer to call it -call it their blunt instrument- as it is a three-in-one tool. It is used for urination, procreation and sexual gratification whereas we have our clitoris-our exquisite bud- just for sexual pleasure alone.

Men continue to wear one because they believe that it gives them an air of intelligence and authority far greater than they actually have. If a tie gets you the job, it says a lot about the people who hired you.

St.Patrick should have used his willy, instead of the shamrock (which is gaelic for little clover) to explain the weird idea of the Holy Trinity, the three-Gods-in-one which is the basis of Christianity.

 Freemasonry might have something to do with this, the first ritual you do involves having a noose around your head.

I am certain that the Irish Free State would not have adopted the male organ as a national symbol – imagine a penis on the side of an Aer Lingus aeroplane or tourist tea-towels full of pinkish pricks. This would have made Ireland a gay destination and there is now an  alternative Gay Matchmakers Festival in Lisdoonvarna, as well as the hetero bachelors  seeking  any female at all but usually American women seeking Irish husbands and craic.

gay-match

From wikipedia  you learn that originally the piece of fabric around the neck was called a cravat derived from the French for Croat. This  Croatian crack regiment came to Paris in 1660 after a victory over the Ottomans and its officers wore colourful silk handerchief around their necks and Louis IV loved this new fashion accessory and even established a regiment named The Royal Cravattes.

With the Industrial Revolution came the forerunner of the modern tie which was long, thin, easy to knot and for daily use.Then in 1926 a New York tie maker, Jesse Langsdorf came up with a method of cutting the fabric on the bias and sewing it in three segments. Before the Second World War ties were worn shorter than they are today; this was due, in part, to men wearing trousers at the natural waist. Around 1944 ties started to become not only wider, but wilder. This reflected the returning GIs’ desire to break with wartime uniformity. Widths reached 5″. The typical length was 48″.The 1960s brought about an influx of pop art influenced designs. The first was designed by a chap called Michael Fish-the term Kipper was a pun on the name because there was a chap called Michael Fish who was a weatherman. michael-fish

The use of coloured and patterned neckties indicating the wearer’s membership in a club, military regiment, school, professional association (Royal Colleges, Inns of Courts) et cetera, dates only from late-19th century England. The immediate forerunners of today’s college neckties were in 1880 the oarsmen of Exeter College Oxford, who tied the bands of their straw hats around their necks.

 

Health and Safety hazard  according to wiki. Necktie opponents cite risks of wearing a necktie as argument for discontinuing it. Their cited risks are entanglement, infection, and vasoconstriction. Entanglement is a risk when working with machinery or in dangerous, possibly violent, jobs such as police officers and prison guards, and certain medical fields. The solution is to avoid wearing neckties, or to wear pre-knotted clip-on neckties that easily detach from the wearer when grabbed. Vascular constriction occurs with over-tight collars.

(Another possibility is to tuck a tie into the shirt through the buttoning, but this protects only against the tie being caught and pulled taut.) Studies have shown increased intraocular pressure in such cases, which can aggravate the condition of people with weakened retinas.There may be additional risks for people with glaucoma. Sensible precautions can mitigate the risk.

Paramedics performing life support  remove an injured man’s necktie as a first step to ensure it does not block his airway. Neckties might also be a health risk for persons other than the wearer. They are believed to be vectors in disease transmission in hospitals. Notwithstanding such fears, many doctors and dentists wear neckties for a professional image. Hospitals take seriously the cross-infection of patients by doctors wearing infected neckties, because neckties are less frequently cleaned than most other clothes. On September 17, 2007, British hospitals published rules banning neckties. In such a context, some instead prefer to use bow ties due to their short length and relative lack of hindrance.

In the UK, it is a popular prank to pull someone’s tie so that it tightens. This prank, known as peanuting or “squatknotting”, is often used to embarrass the victim and can also be used for more severe bullying. In March 2008, a 13-year-old boy from Oxted, in Surrey, was rushed into hospital with spinal injuries after being “peanuted”. He was kept in hospital for three days.

An example of anti-necktie sentiment is found in Iran whose theocratic rulers have denounced the accessory as a decadent symbol of European oppression. To date, most Iranian men in Iran have retained the Western-style long-sleeved collared shirt and three -piece suit, while excluding the necktie. The majority of Iranian men abroad wear neckties according to wiki!

Neckties are viewed by various sub- and counter-culture movements as being a symbol of submission and slavery – having a symbolic chain around one’s neck to the corrupt elite of society, as a “wage slave”.Among those who have expressed this sentiment is the entrepreneur Richard Branson.

branson

Novelty tie etiquette or When to wear one.http://www.necktieadvisor.com/when-to-wear-or-not-to-wear-a-noveltytie

Wearing a novelty tie on casual Friday is a perfect way to liven up an otherwise strict office dress code. The day of an office party. Office parties are meant to be a distraction from the normal workday. Wear a fun tie to remind yourself – and everyone around you – that the day is a special one.On a special occasion. Upcoming special occasions make perfect opportunities to break the norm with a novelty tie. Holidays, sporting events, and other occasions are good reasons to bring a little light-heartedness into the workplace.

Novelty ties, as worn by Prince Harry are for people trying to be sexier than they actually are, while bow ties, as sported by actor and comedian Bill Murray, right, are for creative types and eccentrics.


Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1083521/What-knot-wear-Why-wearing-purple-green-tie-cost-new-job.html#ixzz4RbzsAlMU

Anytime you need a pick-me-up. Work can be a drag, and we all have days where we’d rather be at home. On these days, a novelty tie may be just the thing you need to cheer yourself up. Whether your favorite tie is funny, outrageous, or says something fundamental about who you are, it can be a source of good humor and strength when you need those qualities most.

Anywhere you can manage it. For some people, novelty ties are not just a style – they are a way of life. These people are adept at finding ways to work yet another fun tie into the dress code. With a little daring and flair, you can make novelty ties a fundamental part of your own personal style.

 

The Dicky Bow. A bow for the dick. Sheela-na-Gig says it is worn by men who have had a vasectomy because they they have had a little knot put on their genital equipment. When Dave dresses up for concerts I remind him of this.

Why is  a bow tie called a Dicky bow? A  bow  could, effectively be worn with anything. A hat, a dress or even on a parcel.So to distinguish the bow tie worn with a shirt, it was called a Dicky bow, following the cockney rhyming slang, ‘dicky dirt’ for shirt.

To its devotees the bow tie suggests iconoclasm of an Old World sort, a fusty adherence to a contrarian point of view. The bow tie hints at intellectualism, real or feigned, and sometimes suggests technical acumen, perhaps because it is so hard to tie. Bow ties are worn by magicians, country doctors, lawyers and professors and by people hoping to look like the above. But perhaps most of all, wearing a bow tie is a way of broadcasting an aggressive lack of concern for what other people think.
– Warren St John in The New York Times.

 

 

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